Planning ahead: a kindness to your future self

It can be difficult and uncomfortable to think about being in poor health, and in particular suffering mental or physical incapacity. It is not surprising many couples and families avoid talking about these potential scenarios. But not discussing your wishes and failure to have a plan can leave your loved ones unprepared should something unexpected happen.

Taking steps now to prepare for future situations, however awkward it might feel, should be viewed as a kindness to your future self, as well as a support for loved ones. A plan can reduce stress at what is likely to be a difficult time.

Mental and physical incapacity can affect people at any age or life stage. In some cases, it can follow a sudden event, such as an accident or stroke, for example. The impact is often devastating and life-changing for individuals and their families.

Almost one million people in the UK are living with dementia, according to leading charities. It is a condition which can affect someone’s ability to make decisions about their finances, health and welfare. Thousands more are diagnosed every year, according to NHS data, with around 7% diagnosed before the age of 65.¹

Physical incapacity can be equally difficult for individuals and their families to cope with.

There are health conditions that can lead to physical incapacity, plus road traffic accidents, accidents at work, as well as other incidents which cause immediate and life-changing disabilities.

Questions your family may need to answer

If illness or injury meant you could no longer make some decisions for yourself, there are important questions your family may suddenly have to answer.

Thinking about them in advance can make a difficult situation easier. These include:

• Who can make financial decisions for you?
• Who knows what kind of care you would want?
• How would care be paid for?
• Does anyone know where your important financial and legal documents are?
• Have you made it clear who you trust to act on your behalf?

Andy Payne, Director of Advice Support at St. James's Place, says: "No one wants to think about the possibility of incapacity for a loved one. But if families avoid these conversations and fail to plan for different scenarios and their implications it can lead to significant stress and challenge should something happen.

"Where families have had honest and open conversations about these sorts of subjects and where, as a result, a contingency plan is in place we regularly see how much less stressful life is for all concerned. It helps where decisions have already been made together in advance. This can lower anxiety for loved ones during difficult times."

Steps you can take in advance

1. Talk to the people closest to you
   Have an honest conversation about what you would want to happen if you could no longer make decisions for yourself.
    
2. Consider putting a power of attorney in place
   Think carefully about who you would trust to make decisions on your behalf.
    
3. Think about future care
   Consider what kind of care you might want and how it could potentially be funded.
    
4. Record your wishes and organise important documents
   Keep relevant legal and financial information somewhere safe and accessible.
    
5. Tell someone where everything is
   A beautifully organised file isn’t much help if nobody knows it exists. 

Will or power of attorney: what’s the difference?

A Will records what you want to happen to your estate after you die.

In contrast, a power of attorney arrangement is about entrusting your care, your finances, or both, to another person, in the event you lose capacity.

With a power of attorney, you nominate someone, or more than one person, in advance (known as the attorneys) who you wish to make decisions on your behalf, about your health and welfare, or about your property and finances, should you be unable to do so.

Powers of attorney are legal documents, which work in slightly different ways and with different registration rules in England and Wales, compared to Scotland, and in Northern Ireland.

We can help you think through the financial implications of different scenarios, including how future care might be funded, and build these into  your wider financial plan.

Source

¹NHS England. Primary Care Dementia Data – June 2026.